Tuesday, February 23, 2010

More Fun With Chantal

Chantal Boccaccio - educated, cancerian, sexually ambivalent swinging wannabeIt's been very quiet and boring lately, with Yolande having fled her apartment on North Poinsettia Place and the Think Global Kids website being closed down. No ranting emails and blog comments. No new support groups springing up. Even the County of Los Angeles Office, who spent a lot of time here last Thursday, seem to have retreated into a soporific state. So I thought we could have some more fun with Chantal Boccaccio. Not just because she directed the Think Global Kids promotion video. Not even because she's a director of Think Global Kids...

No - the reason Chantal Boccaccio came to my attention again this week was that it was to her little apartment that Yolande fled recently to escape the clutches of the law (allegedly).
And, of course, because Chantal Boccaccio is a whole bundle of fun. Take the photo opposite, for instance, in which she celebrates the joys of being the former Governor of Alaska and Republican candidate for the Vice Presidency. Just the sort of thing that would encourage you to take an active interest in state and national politics. Especially if you were a spotty 14-year-old boy with a PC in your bedroom. Or indeed, given Chantal's orientation response on myspace, a spotty 14-year-old girl.

Chantal Boccaccio's resumé shows the impressive breadth of her repertoire. As well as being a Naughty Schoolgirl and a Girl of 1000 Faces, Ms Boccaccio has advertised Barcardi Mojito to help get the party going, Nivea cream to disguise those nasty teenage facial zits and Dyson vacuum cleaners to help clean up the mess afterwards. Wow, what a gal!
Chantal Boccaccio as a huntin' fishin' and shootin' all-American mom

Chantal believes in having fun. "Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body", she states on her YouTube profile, "but rather to skid in sideways - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming, "WOO HOO, What a Ride!" Just the sort of message we need to get the nation's kids off their lazy butts and up doing something exciting and creative - such as playing an active role in Think Global Kids.

Having advertised such sexy products as Casabella Lingerie (not to be confused with Cosabella Lingerie), Sure Deodorant, Speedo Swimwear and Clairol Hairspray, along with such zit-inducing offerings as Wendy's Hamburgers, McDonalds, Heineken and Pringles Potato Chips, Chantal has turned to more challenging roles. In the photo left she promotes "bed head", whatever that might be, and on the right we see her in the role of "sperm nurse", whatever one of those is.

Chantal Boccaccio giving bed headChantal Boccaccio as the sperm nurse

In fairness, we all do silly things when we're young and no-one would criticise a budding actress and filmmaker for the odd professional indiscretion in the dim and distant past. Which is why Chantal's latest venture is so important. She's working with Dr. Steven Greer to make a TV show called The Disclosure Project (Because The Destiny of the Human Race Hangs in the Balance).

The Disclosure Project is a nonprofit research project working to fully disclose the facts about UFOs, extraterrestrial intelligence, and classified advanced energy and propulsion systems. Dr. Greer has amassed over 400 government, military, and intelligence community witnesses who have testified about their direct, personal, first hand experience with UFOs, ETs, ET technology, and the cover-up that keeps this information secret. Greer has personally briefed some of America's top Government insiders and is considered by the US Intelligence Community to be the foremost authority on Extraterrestrial Intelligence. ET phone home. Woo Hoo, what a ride in your spaceship!

This is more like it. Just the sort of thing to promote in Think Global Kids... or perhaps it should be renamed Think Intergalactic Kids. Just think of the possibilities. It could be advertised as promoting equal opportunities for little white people, little black people and little green people.

Is the state school system letting your children down? Can your kids not read and write? Do their teachers offer them limited horizons of ambition? Bring them to Think Intergalactic Kids. We'll teach them to speak Cardassian and to count like a Vulcan. And our horizons are boundless.


  1. The nit nurse was someone who inspected your head hair at school looking for something that shouldn't be there. So I guess a sperm nurse inspects your pub...

  2. Let me guess. The sperm nurse looks for aliens in your underpants.

  3. Does Chantal have an agent? Info Please?

  4. Sperm Nurse is a movie - funny
    Danny Bonaduce stars in that movie - is that what this site is about - the sperm nurse movie?

  5. I heard chantell got a two picure deal from this website - maybe she set up the site - after all - the hole site seems to be about her !
    Maybe Yolanda beckless doesnt even exist ! I think this is all about Chantelle getting a movie deal

  6. This is freakin' hilarious -- this is that reality show - PLEAS E tell me where the vote button is-- I want to vote